Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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