apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
