just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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