so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
