Only a mothe r could love this liver
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
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