I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
