If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
