Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
