guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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