I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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