You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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