he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Dick very happy bro
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Randomize
