Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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