i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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