it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
