I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
The beer is more important than you right now.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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