you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize