I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
