I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
