so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
