How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
How's work?
Spinning.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Vodka?
Forever.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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