His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
