Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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