i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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