went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize