Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
