Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I have aggressive nipples.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
