A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
