Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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