they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
