Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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