I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
