You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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