I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
