i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
