i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
