Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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