Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
the liver wants what the liver wants
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
