Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
