We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
