If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
