After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
My ass is underappreciated
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
