its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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