wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
