considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize