you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize