Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
