I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
