I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
