Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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